Overcoming People-Pleasing, Staying Silent and Feeling Guilty

For years I found myself on under a great deal of anxiety and stress which manifested in health issues such as fatigue, insomnia, weight gain and chronic asthma. The culprit? People pleasing! From the time I was a young girl, I sought the approval of everyone around me and worked tirelessly to keep the peace. This long-engrained behavior finally came to a head as I was turning fifty and looked at my life: married to a man with bipolar disorder; overwhelm as a caregiver and “married” single parent; struggling to leave the church of my childhood and fully embrace my God-given purpose. Through a decade-long study of the Word of God, I learned my true identity: one that is centered in pleasing God; not people. I learned how to trust myself, which resulted in an uncanny ability to trust others. I found the voice I had polished professionally and learned to speak out personally, where it mattered most: in parenting and in my personal relationships. The guilt that was engrained in me from childhood on lost its grip and I am able to live free! There is always a tipping point. For me it came as I battled the questions that arise when a loved one attempts suicide; then there was a divorce and finally a re-building of my life. Ironically, the re-buildig came quickly once I had stopped people pleasing, found my voice and began walking in a Christ-centered confidence. My story is no different than thousands of other women who remain in the grip of people pleasing. There is a way out and I can’t wait to talk about it!!